Vanitas in Wonderland
by DarkLunarMidnight
Summary: Vanitas got sick of stupid rules so he went to his secluded area for some peace and quiet. He notices a man that reminds him of someone. He must go after him. (Another random fic by me!) Terranitas !


***~Vanitas in Wonderland~***

**Chapter 1: Welcome Alice...uh...**

**It had been such a blow at the stupid castle, in stupid Radiant Garden, with stupid rules, and stupid Xehanort, with stupid rules! 'Lady Vanitas this, Lady Vanitas that!' They have eyes, they know he has a dick under that dress! Ugh! Vanitas groaned and walked out the stupid castle and made his way to his personal alone area, away from EVERYONE. Leaning against the tree he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, ''Another boring day...I need a nap...'' Vanitas slowly closed his eyes and tried to sleep but something made the shoot open, "Dear dear the Queen will be most upset if I do not make it in time." Vanitas fell silent, "What in the hell.?. Terra?" The "Terra'' he spoke of had a nice fluffy cotton tail with long white rabbit ears. ''I must be high... seriously high...'' "Terra quickly ran and hopped down a hole in the ground, curious Vanitas looked around and slowly crawled towards the gaping hole in the ground. "I'm actually finna do this..." sighing he took a deep breath and hopped down the hole as well. **

**Spinning clocks, flying tea sets, and more bizarre things flew up and about through the air. Vanitas slowly opened his eyes and looked around, "What the hell? Where the hell am I?!" Looking down he saw he was coming upon a room with a table and a door. With a shockingly soft landing the raven looked around the room and saw the cotton tailed brunette run through a small door. Vanitas cocked his head to the side, "How'd he get so small?" "He's not small, you're just simply too big." said a voice. Vanitas looked around, "Who the hell said that?" he asked. "Down here." Vanitas looked down, it was a golden door knob. "You really think you can get to Wonderland in that outfit, wow Alice." Vanitas paused, "Alice? The blond bitch who saved ya'll asses back in the olden days?" he said with a hint of attitude. "And what the hell's wrong with my outfit?" he asked. The golden doorknob looked Vanitas up and down, "Well on the table are two bottles, one to make you bigger and the other to make you smaller." Vanitas turned to the table and picked up the orange bottle, "This? Alright." The raven took a swing of the bottle and he felt himself shrinking. Vanitas felt his body lift off the ground and be surrounded by grey smoke. The dress turned into a maids dress that was black with bloody red clovers decorated on it that stopped above his knees along with stripped red and black stockings, red high heels, and a giant black bow atop his now straighten and curled hair that was shoulder lenght. **

**Vanitas opened his golden eyes and looked around and about until he glanced at a mirror. His eyes widened and he grabbed the mirror from the wall, "What the fuckin' hell did you do to me?!" The doorknob chuckled and looked up Vanitas' skirt, "Yes yes..very nice veiw..." Vanitas glared up at the doorknob, "Look you jackass!" "Ah ah ah, you wanna get inside don't you?" Vanitas growled, "Well let me the fuck in!" The doorknob sighed and opened himself. The raven haired boy entered the door, bright shining white light blinded him as he walked on. **

**"Ugh...what the hell happened?" he asked himself as he rubbed his head and looked around. "You're awake, good, I thought you were dead." Vanitas knew that voice, "Terra?" The cotton tailed teen cocked his head to the side, "Terra? How do you know my name beautiful?." Vanitas rolled his eyes, "Tch, aren't you late for the queen's whatever?" Terra chuckled and leans down, "I would if I cared but I don't and I want you." Vanitas shot up, "Beg pardon? And where the hell am I?!" Terra crawled on top of the raven haired young teen and intertwined their fingers. "I shall take you and you will enjoy it." Vanitas made a mental note: 'Note to self- Alice was apparently raped by the white rabbit!' Terra softly kissed down the raven haired maidens neck and pulled back, "Where shall I start now?" He taunted as he trailed his hand up the raven's dress. Vanitas blushed and looked away, 'Dammit it feels so good I don't want him to stop, not at all...Oh god yes, go further! Touch me-' Vanitas' fantasy was cut short when a vibrating ring made him look at the man, "Oh my, sorry to cut our meeting short love but I must go." And with that the brunette went off into the distance. Vanitas twitched, "The fuck yo?! You're just gonna leave me with this fuckin' boner?!" Vanitas growled and started walking, "When I see that useless son of a bitch I'm gonna-" "You're goooona~?" Vanitas quickly looked around, "Who said that?" The voice sounded by his ear, "I did." Vanitas jumped at the close encounter, "I don't see you." As soon as he said that, a smile appeared in mid-air then a light and dark purple stripped tail, next were paws; they colored the same as the tail, then a pairing of shining ocean blue eyes, and finally the body was dressed exactly like the tail dark and light purple with a round chubby face. "Sooo Alice, where ya headed?" Vanitas narrowed his eyes at the brunette cat, "Name ain't Alice kid, it's Vanitas." The cat huffed and pouted, "Exuse me then...**_Vanny~." _

**THAT made the raven upset, "Look kid," he began lifting up his dress, "I have the biggest boner right now so unless ya want me to fuck you into oblivion I'd advise you to fuck off!" The little cat looked at the boy up and down, "Teehee~! Te-chan did that huh~? It's funny when he gets kiddies like you all wet and hard!" he teased. "Oh! My name means sky if you can figure it out I shall, and will, give you a reward. Ooh! Here's a hint, it's in Japanese!" Now Vanitas regrets not listening to his old man when he was giving out all that kanji stuff, "Sky? ...Sora?" "Ding-ding-ding! You guessed it! Sora's the name and riddles/blowjobs is my game!" "Say wha?" "You heard me, but I'm not giving you one because you were being all mean to me. And besides, you need to head this way." The cat jumped down and began skipping to the destination. Vanitas followed slowly behind, watching the brunettes ass jiggle with every bounce.**

** "Here we are! But be very careful~!" The little neko boy who was named Sora quickly hopped off and disappeared into the dark forest. Vanitas groaned and sighed as he continued walking down the path alone. "That stupid brat probably lead me into a fuckin dead end, little bitch." He continued to walk and began to think that this path was endless until he saw a white table in the distance. As he got closer and closer he began to see people along with tea cups on said table. **_**'Oh great, what freak show have I walked into this time?" **_**"Uh...hello?" A silver haired teenager with a black top hat spun around his chair and looked at Vanitas. "What do you want? Who are you?" Vanitas glared at the teen, "All that damn attitude isn' caused for y'know? I'm Vanitas. Who are you?" The teenager lifted up the hat to reveal his sharp electric blue eyes, "They call me the Mad Hatter." Vanitas rose an eyebrow, "The Mad Hatter? Well 'Mad Hatter' what is your actual name?" The Mad Hatter seemed to ponder on what to reply with, then all of a sudden it hit him. "I'll give you a hint: my name is Japanese for **_**land **_** and if you can get it right I'll show you were to go and how to get out, but if you fail then I'll be forced to destroy you." **

** Vanitas mentally groaned **_**"No way, more of this fuckin asian shit? Why not print "is a translator" on my fuckin forehead." **_**Vanitas bit his thumb and tried to wrap his brain around it. After a few seconds he remembered the stupid, yet helpful, acronym that Terra taught him. Terra is Vanitas's foreign language teacher, well back in the normal world. **_**"NKSVAVTR...Naminè to Kairi, Sora to Ventus, Aqua to Vanitas, Terra to Riku...Oceanwave, ocean, sky, wind, water, empty, earth and...land...Riku! His name's Riku!" **_

** "Is it Riku?" The Mad Hatter removed the top hate and smiled towards the raven, "That's right, Riku. It looks like you've already met the Chesire Cat." Vanitas blinked cluelessly, "The what?" Riku chuckled, "I mean Sora. The annoying little brunette." "Yeah him. Tch, brat. So hey you said you'd tell me how the hell to get outta here." The silverette poured himself a glass of tea then gestured for the raven haired boy to come forth. Vanitas came and sat beside the teenager, glancing at him from the corner of his eyes. "So Riku, about getting outta this place?" Riku seemed to ignore the question and slid a cup of tea towards him, "So you're crushing on Terra are you?" **

** A peach colored blush came across the raven's cheeks, "Yeah I guess so...I'd never tell him though, but I think he knows already." Riku seemed to have fallen silent, "...Is that so?" Before the raven knew it a keyblade came across his cheek, slashing the soft skin. "What's your damage man?!" Riku glared and went for another attack. Vanitas dodged it just in time, the tip of the blade only cut the ribbons pinning up his hair. **_**"Dammit, I gotta get outta here!" **_**Vanitas glared around the area and spotted a path, **_**"There!" **_** Vanitas dodged the oncoming attack from Riku and darted down the path he saw. **

** When he'd finally ran outta breath Vanitas stopped to catch his breath, "That damn bitch was crazy...Wonder what his damage was..." Vanitas stood and dusted himself off, "Now...where do I go?"**


End file.
